RuPaul ends drag race with the catchphrase “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?” Since Valentine’s Day is tomorrow I thought we all needed a reminder to love ourselves.
It’s no secret that I’ve struggled with loving myself. I can’t honestly say that I fully, 100%, love myself. On my very best days I’m only loving myself 93-95%. I still listen to that voice in my head that tells me I’m not good enough. I still look in the mirror and glance over my hairy body, my moles, my belly, my dick and scrutinize myself. I still obsess over my age, channel my inner Lana Del Rey and wonder if someone will still love me since I’m no longer young and beautiful. I can’t help to think back to last Valentine’s Day remembering the grief my crush got for making out with me. Ageism ran rampant.
I’m without a valentine but I have made peace with that. It’s not the first time and it probably won’t be the last. I know that I’ll find the one that is right for me. Tomorrow I’m going to treat myself.
Even if you’ve found love I suggest that you do the same. Be your own valentine. Remember the things that you love about yourself. Ignore the voice in your head that points out the flaws and embrace the voice that tells you how great you are.
I know, for myself, loving yourself is a process. Some days it’s more manageable than others. That’s okay. All I ask is that you start the process. Find something that you love about yourself and hold onto that.